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The First-Timer's Guide To New Orleans


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Sunday

Bed 0130, up 0630
Bus 0800, flight 1300

Brian was recognised by one of the US Immigration officials at Dublin airport. A music fan.
Long flight to Chicago, long wait at Chicago. Then a short flight into the warm Louisiana night.

The porter was so helpful: he directed us from the expensive airport shuttle to the free hotel transport. Unfortunately, it wasn't to the correct hotel, so we had to take a taxi. And the driver was a stone crazy woman.
     

The title of this blog is an unashamed attempt to drive up the number of hits by implying that it's a guide for first-timers, rather than the guide OF a first-timer. I've just returned from ten days in New Orleans, my first visit.

I've been to the USA quite a few times, having seen New York, Washington DC, Atlanta, bits of Florida, Georgia and Tennessee; and then on the other side of the continent, the Los Angeles and San Francisco areas. New Orleans isn't like any of them. In fact, it's completely unique.

     

At least, the old heart of the city is unique, even if the wider metropolitan area is pretty much generic American. But it's a big heart. On a map, you can identify it as the part that lies mostly inside a Southward loop of the Mississippi river. Incidentally, the Northern bank of the river here is the East bank, and the Southern is the West bank. I don't know, it's some convention about whether you face upstream or down, or something.

     

That oddity probably wasn't the reason, but it definitely took me a couple of days to get a feel for the geography of New Orleans. The streets do generally follow a grid pattern, but the grid kinks from district to district. The tourist core of the city is the French Quarter, a rectangular grid of about a dozen 'verticals' and six 'horizontals'. Once you've remembered which streets run parallel and which cross, then you can easily find your way around.

Monday

Took the correct hotel shuttle back to the airport to get the cheap public bus into town. Met a guy at the bus stop who had just broken his ankle. Brian went to get the airport people to call for help, and soon the sheriff's dept. and paramedics arrived.

We had read on the Amtrak website that the rail station had a left luggage department. This was a lie, so we took our luggage on a tour of the French Quarter and had dinner. It was raining. We got a taxi to Danielle's place, where plans to go out on the town again dissolved ino fatigue.

     

The French Quarter is bordered on one side by Canal Street, which forms a public transportation hub to the inner city, linking the most interesting districts. You can be transportated by bus or streetcar West to the Garden District, and University Area and Zoo. (The University is the one with Professors.) Another street car line runs North-South down the centre of Canal itself (it's cool New Orleans speak to drop the "Street" or "Avenue") and the city's third line links the foot of Canal at the river to the huge convention center to the West, and the French Market to the East.

       

Bus routes also run East from Canal, across the 'top' and 'bottom' of the French Quarter; and further afield to the Faubourg-Marigny and beyond.

Bus and streetcar prices are a very reasonable $1.25 for each single journey, or $1.50 for a "transfer" which allows you to take a second (or even third, or fourth!) line to your destination. You can also buy a day pass for unlimited travel from the driver. Three and five-day passes can be bought from the RTA machine on Canal, or from a number of stores, notably all the branches of Walgreens the pharmacist (of which there are many, some open 24 hours).

       

Tuesday

We went out on a mission to acquire musical instruments, and were eventually successful at New Orleans Musical Exchange on Magazine Street. We had lunch nearby, got a taxi back to the house, and then another to the theatre for soundcheck. I say "theatre", but I really mean "disused Victorian factory".

Fringe opening party in the evening. Free food, drink, and pretentious fringers. Bed 02:00. Incredibly cold that night.

Canal Street is a curious mix of the most upmarket hotels and shopping combined with tacky tourist shops and cheap, utilitarian stores for downmarket locals. Actually, the latter two classes intersect. Historically, Canal formed the boundary between two towns: old French New Orleans, and the town of new American settlers, once the state had been sold to the USA in 1803. The American side is now known as the Central Business District, and as the name suggests, it's the most boring part of central New Orleans, although not entirely devoid of attractions.

       

The French Quarter's central axis is its most famous street: Bourbon Street. Bourbon is ideally suited for stag parties and hen parties and the like (what Americans more comprehensibly call bachelor and bachelorette parties), or in other words, totally unsuited for normal people. OK, you probably will want to experience it for one evening, but bear in mind that it's brash, tacky, vulgar and full of annoying drunks. Trust me, there are other streets where you get a much classier type of drunk. Every building on Bourbon is a bar, restaurant or strip club. (Or, at least, I assumed that they were strip clubs. I was informed by a more adventurous colleague in search of erotic entertainment that the real activity is prostitution.)

Wednesday

Bed 02:00, up 04:30
Breakfast TV live broadcast - fortunately and miraculously from the old church just 50m from home.
Bed 06:00, up 12:00
Walked to French Market and caught the riverfront streetcar to Canal Street. We crossed to Algiers on the free ferry, but there was not much to see, so we came back and had lunch (some with margaritas) at the Riverfront Mall food court. Strolled up Canal to Bourbon Street where we bought frozen daquiris which lasted all the way home.
Speaking of buildings, it's the architecture that makes the French Quarter so quaint and tourist magnetic. (Yes, as well as the alcohol and easy ladies.) Virtually everything dates to the nineteenth century, or even the latter years of the eighteenth. Everything. What would be an execptional survival in San Francisco or Washington is just par for New Orleans. Most buildings are authentically decrepit and wonky; the main exception being the cathedral. Even though it's a genuine old building, dating to 1794, recent renovation has rendered it pristine. It looks like the Disney castle.

     

Decatur Street, which runs in front of the cathedral and forms one border of the French Quarter, is one option for bars absent of people you'd like to strangle. It also has the green, open space of Jackson Square facing the cathdral, and opposite that, a mini amphitheatre, where there's entertainment at weekends. Right next to that is the Café du Monde, which claims to have invented the beignet - the New Orleans square doughnut. Mmmm, beignets. (It's pronounced "BAY-nyay" in true French style.)

Decatur (pronounced d'cater) parallels the river. Until relatively modern times, the riverfront was entirely industrial and maritime, even right here in the city centre, but there is now a nice esplanade to stroll along, named "Moonwalk", not in memory of Michael Jackson (that would be the brewery) but for "Moon" Landrieu, the progressive Democrat mayor who promoted its regeneration.

Thursday

The trains wake us up in the mornings, playing a very musical minor seventh chord on their horns. We found that the cat had been sick. Everywhere. I cleaned up and went back to bed.

In the morning, we went back on the streetcar to Canal for some unsuccessful shopping, and in the afternoon played our preview segment at the festival tent. Free drinks. It went well.

In the early evening, we met up and changed for the first show. The Candle Factory looked much more inviting with the audience seating set out. The gig was a good one, with an almost capacity crowd.

Home, changed and out to another fringe party. Drink not free! $3 each. While the others mingled and talked fringe thee-atah, I listened to the blues band. Bed late.
       

Apparently, many tourists never see any part of New Orleans other than the French Quarter. Unless your time was so short that you couldn't go elsewhere, a little more exploration is highly recommended. Adjoining the French Quarter on the East side is the district known as Faubourg-Marigny. Although mostly residential, it does include Frenchmen Street, a much better and more authentic site for real New Orleans nightlife than Bourbon Street.

The quiet, tree-lined streets of the rest of the Faubourg-Marigny are mostly filled with the old, original style of house, the shotgun shack. Generally built as a semi-detached pair, the shacks are narrow, but deep, with a single column of interconnected rooms with no corridor. In the one we stayed in, you had to walk through both bedrooms to get to the kitchen.

Friday

The cat was better. He slept on the arm of the couch that was my bed.

I checked out and took a taxi to the St. Vincent's Guest House, or "The Orphanage", as I called it. Because it was. Huge room with a very high ceiling, and my first act was to pull down the curtains off that very high ceiling. Getting them back up required some ingenuity.

I walked to Canal St. and then the French Quarter and had a late lunch po'boy; then met the rest of the team and performed a short set at the festival tent.

In the evening, we all went to 'Pravda', an ancient, ramshackle bar in the French Quarter, with a long garden/courtyard at the back, where we saw fringe buddies doing circus stuff and belly dancing in the candlelight. It was like something from the eighteenth century. I walked home, about half an hour.
     
On the opposite, Western, side of Canal Street to the French Quarter and Faubourg-Marigny, the Garden District is a moderate walk or short streetcar ride. It too is residential and filled with traditional houses, but these are mansions, not shacks. All big columned porticoes and that sort of thing. And gardens, of course. Further out is the University area and Riverbend, but I only got there for one night, seeing a gig at the Maple Leaf with the Rebirth Blues Band.

Saturday

I took the streetcar up Canal to the Regional Transport Authority headquarters so that I could get some maps and timetables and a bus pass. It was closed, but a nice security man let me in and gave me the material. I got the pass from an automatic machine outside.

I used my new bus pass to get to the festival tent where we played a carefully selected afternoon set for the kiddies. Afterwards, we split up and I wandered the French Quarter a bit more, having lunch and then a pint of Guinness in the Kerry before getting the bus home.

The 9pm show was good although my bass stopped working and had to be miked up. The perils of live music.

Afterwards we all went to Frenchmen Street. There was a mediocre covers band playing in the bar we chose, but fortunately we heard a great street band outside, and spent the rest of the evening listening to them. (Well, it was the rest of the evening for me. Some continued to indulge.)
After kindly being allowed to sleep on a couch in the Faubourg-Marigny during the Fringe Festival, which was based in that area, I moved out into an orphanage. Now the St. Vincent Guest House, it features the original mid-1800s buildings arranged around a courtyard (now with a pool) and offers a range of accommodation from private rooms to shared dorms. It's shabby but picturesque. Being on Magazine street in the Lower Garden District, it's within walking distance of Canal Street (about 20 minutes) or a choice of either bus or streetcar (about 7 minutes). The streetcars on St. Charles Avenue run all night, which is handy for nights out.

As well as the Charles and Canal streetcars, a third service runs during daytime along the riverfront. It's very handy for getting from Canal to the French Market, a covered market on the site of the original one, but now under a modern open-sided shed. If you must buy tourist tat, this is the place, because it's about two-thirds the price of identical items in the shops. (OK, I bought two t-shirts and a baseball cap, but the latter only because the hot sun was burning my head.)

     

Sunday

This was the hottest day yet. I was up and out by 10:00 to go to the city's oldest cemetary. Two of the old tombs had voodoo associations, and people had left all manner of offerings, from beads to Coke bottles, and scratched "XXX" into the plaster.

All the old stones are in French, as late as the 1900s. I was getting sunburned, so I went to the French Market and bought a hat. Then lunch.

I got the bus back along Magazine Street and accidentally went a bit too far. So: exploration.

I went out again for the evening gig and got the bus to Canal Street, then another (with guide) to the venue. Our lovely soundman, Ratty, (yes, really) loaned me a nice old hollowbody bass, which I liked a lot more than the (possibly faulty) rented one. The gig went well.
My visit in the latter part of November coincided with a spell of exceptionally hot weather, with temperatures just below 30°C instead of around 20°C. If you like that sort of thing, and I do, April or October would be a better month to visit. In July and August, with the average temperatures well above 30°C and, more importantly, high humidity, I could imagine that it might be less pleasant. August and September are the peak hurricane months.
   

Most of the damage done by Hurricane Katrina in 2005 has been repaired, but it's still easy to find some buildings, mostly homes, that are still boarded up. Even more sinister are the remaining search team symbols, spray-painted on the walls, a large "X" with notations of the date and any survivors -- or bodies -- found.

While I was in the city, I happened to see a television news item about the release of the annual 'City Crime Ratings' publication, which is compiled by a commercial organisation, but based on FBI crime statistics. What made it newsworthy was that New Orleans had dropped out of the top ten most dangerous cities, from 6 last year to 13. Out of 400. (Top of the charts this year is nearby St. Louis, Missouri; and the 400th, or safest, city is Colonie, New York. No, I hadn't heard of it either. For obvious reasons.)

Monday

Gordon and I took the instruments back to Music Exchange. The bass worked perfectly when they tried it, of course.
I then went on further up Magazine Street for more exploration, looped back on a streetcar and returned to the French Quarter. At the 'Beerfest' bar, a whaite tresh barmaid called me darling and sold me expensive beer. I then had an expensive lunch in the upmarket Blue Bayou restaurant.
The whole team went out for dinner, where I got dreadful indigestion (which wasn't on the menu). It kept me awake all night.

   

Tuesday

Indigestion pain and lack of sleep made me too grumpy to go out in the morning, but I went back into town in the afternoon. No lunch, but I sampled the famous baignets at the Café du Monde, which claims to have invented them. They taste exactly like doughnuts. They're just square is all.

In the evening, I went out for dinner by myself, and on the way, saw an opossum on someone's porch. Quite a big animal, white face, thick tail.
   

Wednesday

Last day. I went to the French Market to buy a souvenir t-shirt. (They're $13 compared to $21 in the shops.)
I found myself in Washington Square park where I watched the squirrels. Single, squirrels are cute, but when you get a big chain of them flowing over a tree, it looks creepy, like a nest of rats. With fluffy tails. I then took the long walk back towards our first home in the Marigny to a nice liberal second-hand bookshop to get a book for my flight.

In the evening, I had lunch in the nearby Chinese/Japanese restaurant on St. Charles Avenue, and then some funny beers in the Avenue Bar. Like Belgian apple-infused weissbeer, for example.

Drink and excess may be the typical fare of New Orleans, but curiously, the statistic where it doesn't do so badly is problem binge drinking.

(Maybe the stat only applies to residents, not visitors.)

With 24 hour drinking and no legal prohibition on boozing on the streets (as long as your container is not glass) you'd think that New Orleans people might have alcohol problems, but apparently not. Perhaps it's the old Southern European culture of drinking for enjoyment, rather than the Northern ethos of drinking to get blotto.

The other excess is food. New Orleans cuisine is a rich mixture of European, American and African influences, from gumbo and jambalaya to the sandwiches for the poor boys. (A po'boy is a soft sub filled with, typically, either slow-cooked roast beef or seafood. You can buy them everywhere.)

You can always find somewhere to eat at any time of the day. Always unhealthy. But that 's the New Orleans way: eat, drink and be merry.

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